Plan B: When the bottom falls out

I have only met a select number of individuals who have intentionally created a strategic plan for their life, which can ultimately serve as a personal safety net for when the bottom falls out.


Who actually has a Plan B to put into action when the bottom falls out?

I am not talking about a 401K, or an emergency fund for support when a financial crisis hits. I am referring to the type of fall-out that is beyond financial recovery. Despite popular belief, money IS NOT the save-all solution when disaster strikes. I know that may come as a surprise to some of you and somewhat hard to believe, but it’s a well-proven fact.

While having a financial cushion to fall on during hard times is a wise decision and a life goal to accomplish, money most certainly cannot provide stability during a psychological or emotional breakdown, it cannot restore a fragile and troubled relationship, money certainly can’t undo a pending divorce, or reverse a terminal illness, and it definitely can’t heal the effects of a tragic accident or death of a loved one. As beneficial as money can be, it is not a key component in the restoration process when the bottom falls out.

Aside from money, there are a number of other things which people turn to in hopes of restoring their own sense of normalcy, most of which only contribute more to the problem. Extramarital affairs, substance use and abuse, or other destructive behaviors which only add fuel to the already out-of-control inferno. Fall Outs are a really hard place to be in and if there is no Plan B to resort to, lives will inevitably go in a wide range of unsafe, unhealthy and unholy directions Very Quickly!


Why it is necessary to have a Plan B!

Anyone who has ever experienced the bottom falling out can testify to the fact that right after the bottom falls out, all hell breaks loose, lives get flipped turned upside down, emotions are scattered all over the place, chaos shows up at every turn, door after door gets slammed shut, then one break down and obstacle after another comes barging in with little to no help or relief in sight. Not to mention, everyone around “appears” to be untrustworthy, undependable, or not genuinely concerned with what is happening in your life. But, it’s not the end of the world, and Redemption is not as far off as one may believe.


Bottom Fall-Outs can be very brutal, difficult to navigate and are hard to bounce back from, especially when their is no Plan B. Even with a Plan B, the journey will still be challenging. At least with a plan to fall back on, it makes the trek back to normalcy more tolerable and manageable. And as hard as it may be to wrap your mind around this fact, Fall Outs are not always linked to something that you have done wrong. AND Most Importantly Fall Outs have significant spiritual value.

SO…How does one create a Plan B?

Creating a Plan B for any event in life takes nothing short of being Intentional.


Strategically making preparations ahead of time is not something that most people think about doing, until the inevitable happens. Then they find themselves in the midst of the chaos with no clue on how to navigate through to the other side. It is only after-the-fact that they come to realize the importance of planning ahead.

This particular type of life preparation is more than the typical planning ahead that most people think about. For instance, purchasing life insurance for the future financial peace of your family in the event of your death, or creating a financial cushion for when the layoff comes, or having a back-up plan in the event the mortgage company forecloses on the family home, etc.

You can be sure that when the bottom falls, there will be no time to stop and create a strategic plan of action. Because when the bottom falls out, the walls also begin to close in all around you and the ceiling is but moments away from crashing down. So a Plan B is definitely something that needs to be intentionally created well in advance.

I have read several articles, blogs and self-help books on the topic of creating a personal strategic plan for life, which can ultimately assist one in the event of a fall out. While there are no fool-proof scientific methods of survival, it is still worth putting in the effort to create your own personal back up plan because Your Life and all of its events are worth planning for.

Why? Because Your life and all of its events have eternal significance and purpose.






If there is one thing the enemy of your destiny enjoys doing to you, it’s reminding you of your past and all of your mistakes.

If you spend too much time there, you will begin to feel unqualified, unworthy, unfit to do what you know God has purposed for you to do.

You will get all tangled up in what you feel and think about yourself, and all of your incapabilities, or worse, what others think and say about you will trip you and cause you to become stuck and immovable.

Do me a quick favor and >>Hit That Pause Button Right Now<<

REFOCUS on WHO and WHAT this is Really all about…

REMIND yourself Right Here-Right Now that…

It’s NOT about You!!

It’s NOT about Me!!

It’s NOT about Us!!

It’s NOT about Them!!

It doesn’t matter who you WERE, He STILL Chose YOU!!

It doesn’t matter what you’ve done, HE STILL Wants To Use YOU!!

It doesn’t matter what others say, think, feel, or believe about you, HE HANDPICKED YOU!!


Please Receive This Truth!!

Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God?

Do not be deceived.

Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. 

And such WERE some of YOU. 




in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.

That’s Great News right there!!

Believe it for yourself and Share it with others who may need to be Reminded!!

Why & How To A.B.I.D.E.

John 15:4-5

 Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me.

 “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing.

I began my investments into the Multi Level Marketing (MLM) world when I was just 18 years old. Since that time, I have invested in and tried many, many different products and business opportunities. Part of the package deal with nearly all MLM business endeavors includes conferences to attend. I have literally heard hundreds of motivational and personal development speakers in my 30+ years of being in the MLM world. There are certain commonalities in every MLM conference, and if you are the least bit familiar with that environment, you will most likely agree with what I am about to share.

Conference time in the MLM world are Really Exciting Times! It’s like a high school Pep Rally before the big game, times 10, some times 100!! If you have never been to one, you should really try it out, at least once in your lifetime, even if it’s just for the experience and personal development aspect of it all. The agenda is always filled with really great speakers, who know exactly how to get your creative juices flowing. They are highly skilled and trained to Motivate, Inspire and Empower you to conquer your fears and take on the world. There will always be at least one speaker who will emphasize the need to find your “WHY”. Which is a really important factor, not just in the MLM world, but in life and with any endeavor or journey one finds themselves in.

In the MLM world, Your WHY plays a huge part in the success of what you are trying to accomplish. WHY you love the product, WHY you love the company, WHY you love working for yourself and being your own boss, WHY, WHY, WHY, You Must Find Your Why!

Then they shift gears and share 1001 “HOW TO” tips and tricks on HOW TO market the product, HOW TO market the business, HOW TO grow the business, HOW TO grow Your Team, etc…

Most MLM models include not only those two really important components, but the Major Selling Point is always found in THE RESULTS!!! The ticket to success is not about SELLing the products or SELLing the business, but about “SHARING The Results.” Because when you Share The Results, then you don’t have to SELL a thing. The Results do the selling, basically the product & business sells itself. So then, you are left Reaping The Rewards, The FRUIT!!!

Everyone loves a positive outcome, an inspiring testimony, a major win after a rough and tough start. The Results portion of an MLM Conference Reaffirms the WHY, causing all of the HOW TOs to either Jump Start or Add Momentum to those already with a running start.

Now PLEASE stay with me here and don’t let any of this MLM talk get you confused as to where I am heading with all of this.

Some of the Products, Businesses, and Results I have been privy to invest in and have tried over the years, have been and still are Real Legit Products & Businesses. The majority are actually really great products and are really good for you and your family. So I am NOT knocking any MLM business or product. I am simply saying all of this to prove a point… The Point being that Models and Methods used in the MLM world Really Do Work!

The Why + How To = Results [FRUIT]  THE METHOD REALLY DOES WORK!!!

So, if that method works on getting individuals to try new products, or invest in starting their own business, why not use the same type of concept in other areas? Areas where it takes a little more persuasion than normal to convince someone to give something new a try. Areas where it takes a system, a method or a specific model to accomplish an end goal, to Reap The Results…a.k.a…to Bear Fruit!

Now do you see where I am going with this???

It’s “The Method” of, Finding THE WHY, plus learning all of the HOW TOs, in order to reach THE RESULTS, which can be used in just about any situation, circumstance, event, relationship, purpose, or plan for Personal Development & Growth.

So I said all of that to say…

Simply “Knowing About” Christ and “Being Familiar” with The Word of God are simply not going to be enough to “Set Your Heart On The Things Above”. It’s a really great start, but it’s going to take a little more effort than acquiring a general knowledge of or possessing strong feelings for, or having a deep desire to ABIDE In Christ and in The Word, in order to experience that deeper, more intimate level of spirituality.

To ABIDE means, comply with, obeyobservefollow, keep to, hold to, conform to, adhere to, stick to, stand by, act in accordance with, upholdheedaccept, go along with, acknowledgerespect, defer to, toleratebearstand, put up with, endure, …

Sounds simple enough, but in actuality, ABIDING is not a single, one-time decision or event, nor is it an easy task to accomplish. It requires nothing short of Daily Discipline, which in turn requires Divine Intervention, even for the Super Spiritually Devoted Follower of Christ.

The Fruit reaped through this “Act of Abiding” are out-of-this-world incredible!!!

Finding and using every available tool in order to accomplish the task is worth searching for, to help one stay focused and actively “Abiding”.

In my search of a “How To” guide and not being able to find what I needed to fit my individual needs, I decided to create one of my own, one that works just right for me.

Using the same concept I learned in the MLM world, I began by asking myself 2 very simple questions:


and How To?

Why? because I wanted to Reap the Good Fruit as mentioned in John 15.

1. WHY Abide?

2. HOW TO Abide?

This personal model was created within a couple of weeks, as I sought answers to those questions, and waited on the Holy Spirit to Guide and Direct me.

Using each individual letter of the word A.B.I.D.E. the answers to those questions began to unfold and this model was the end results…


Struck Down again…But Not Destroyed!

We have all heard the saying, “What doesn’t kill you only makes you Stronger”


YES, Stronger!


How is that even possible when one’s heart has been completely crushed and shattered and emotions are all over the place?!

Especially if the heartbreak comes out of nowhere and things don’t seem to add up or make any sense and life as one has known it to be, has been completely flipped upside down?!

Where and How can one find strength when they are weakened by life-altering events?!

Strength is found only by Surrendering to the Father and allowing Him to handle what we can’t. He supplies Supernatural Strength when our own strength has been compromised through traumatic experiences.

Strength has a way of emerging during trials because of an inner coping mechanism called Resilience, which God designed and placed inside each one of us. When we surrender everything into His Hands, He activates our inner strength and thus begins the process of developing character through endurance and perseverance, leading to HOPE and JOY! Yes, even JOY!!

When we are finally in a place where we can look back, after-the-fact, then we are able to recognize that God had our back from the very beginning, to the bitter end, and everything in between, thus producing Strength for the next battle that is to come. Trust me, more will come!

It still blows my mind when I look back and see the resiliency and Hope I have developed over the years in light of all the traumatic events & experiences I have been through in life.

Here lately, I have managed to hold it together despite being separated for the last 4 months from my husband of 12 years. It has been an adjustment on so many levels, but it’s actually been a lot easier than I thought it would be. It hasn’t always been a nice walk in the park, but it’s definitely been manageable.

All of the shifting and changes that had taken place over the last several years, leading up to this separation, is also what has made this transition more bearable in comparison to the other breakups from my past. I do have to admit though, this is the last thing I expected to be going through again, especially at my age. I’m not quite sure yet if this separation is just a temporary thing or if it will lead to something more permanent, but I do know that God is in control regardless of the outcome and I’m following His Lead!

When I look back at past relationships and experiences I’ve had, it’s any wonder I am still alive & thriving today.

The Goodness, Faithfulness & Amazing Grace of God has always been my Unfailing and Unlimited Source of Strength, Courage, Love, Joy, and Peace!

I could very easily swim in the pool of despair and misery, and allow all of the “things that have happened to me” to harden my heart, but I truly believe there is more Strength in Forgiveness.

I also understand that there is a Purpose in all of the pain. God surely hasn’t wasted a single event or forgotten a single tear shed through it all.

There are literally thousands of passages of scripture I use to gain Strength from.

here are just a few…

Reminder: Journal the Journey

“Journal The Journey” is a phrase I’ve heard mentioned many times over the years by several different leaders, in various settings like: personal growth and development seminars, psychology and counseling classes, Pastor’s Sunday morning sermon, health and wellness coaches, physical therapists, mentors and life coaches, etc.

In the moment, you may not think it to be all that important to document your life events, especially in a handwritten format. But, I challenge you to give it a try for at least 6 weeks and see if you still feel the same at the end. Just one entry a day for the next 160 days will change your life, in a really great way.


  • To Remember things in the current week/month
  • To Remind yourself of past events weeks/months later
  • In Remembrance after months/years have passed
  • To Serve as an ‘Altar of Remembrance’ for yourself, as well as for others after you are no longer here

Written reminders are no doubt very useful today, so much so that an entire company is dedicated to creating various shapes, sizes and colors of note size pieces of paper for your convenience. Trust me, the older you get, the harder it gets to remember things, so start now, if you’re not already doing so. You won’t regret it!

Journals are great because they create a story-line of where you have been, what you have done, and especially where you are heading, with all of the good and even the not-so-good stuff in between.

Handwritten Memories of life events that you may one day want to share with your beloved children, grandchildren, and all the great-grands that follow. Treasures they will surely cherish no doubt.

It’s the very reason why Our Father in Heaven had His own Timeline of Events handwritten. The Bible was handwritten by over 40 different Inspired Writers, over a span of 1,500 years, to serve as a Memorial of All That Had Been Done since the very beginning til Now. It also includes all that is still yet to come and All That He Is Still Yet To Do!

It’s also the reason why He commanded the Children of Israel to set up ‘Altars of Remembrance’, in different locations, marking different important events in time, because He knew they would soon forget all the Great Things He had done and of His Faithfulness.

We no longer build altars in the same way they did in the past, but journaling and writing can definitely be a way of remembering all of the Blessings and even the Struggles, as well as all of the periods of Battling while Waiting on the Miracles.


I began my own journaling journey many years ago, when I was just 10 years old. I’m 50+ now, so 40+ years of purposefully writing things down. I wish I could say I still had all of those journals in my possession, but due to divorce, natural disasters, and other unfortunate circumstances, I only have about half of those years stored away on many journal pages and even some in digital format on flash drives. It’s always a treat to go back years later to re-read and reflect on how far I have traveled, how much has changed and especially how much I have grown over the years.

It’s the reason I prefer to gift others with this very simple, very affordable, and very valuable tool, because each one is truly a Unique & Priceless Gift, especially after they are filled with the Handwritten Timelines of someone’s Life Experiences!

Purpose in all of the pain

Feeling weak, exhausted, anxious, stressed, or depressed?

You’re Not Alone!

It seems to be the new ‘norm of the day’ nowadays for so many to be living in survival mode, on the edge, one decision away from a major life-change…

Do you even sometimes feel that your Faith is slowly drifting away because you just can’t understand why so many difficult things are happening to you, all at once, over and over again, with no relief in sight?

Do you ever find yourself wondering or asking,

  • Why is God allowing so many bad things to happen in my life? (Especially if one is genuinely trying to do the right things and live the right way!)
  • Why hasn’t He removed all of these burdens from my life YET?
  • Doesn’t He see that I am in over my head?
  • Doesn’t He hear my prayers?
  • Does He even care about ME?!?!

2 Timothy 3:1-5 warned us that critical and hard times would come. These warnings were written long, long ago for our benefit, today, so that we would not be completely caught off-guard.

However, although they shouldn’t come as a surprise to us, when trials come knocking on our door, we do tend to get blindsided and lose our focus for a moment. That is perfectly normal and human nature, so cut yourself some slack.

Regardless of how hard we try to avoid them, hard times will come, and unfortunately, they do fall on all of us. No one is exempt!

The days and times we are living in today can be very challenging, which make it difficult for some of us to stay hopeful and positive.

But I’m here to remind you that, There Is HOPE! There truly is a purpose in all of the heartache, and suffering, and pain.

There is a purpose in All Of It!

I found this really great article written by an authentic Christian writer, that does a wonderful job of putting it all into perspective.

Please read it and then share it with someone you know could use a little Hope!

Who Holds You Together?

The last few months of my life have been some awfully challenging days…

Pruning, Transition and Valley Season can be some of the most brutal of all seasons, BUT oh the other side is so worth all of the heartache and pain, I promise!!

I can’t even begin to tell you how many people I have spoken to, just within this past week, who are also going through the tough seasons of life. Stressed, depressed and struggling to survive and navigate through another day are the norms of life for so so many people nowadays. Reconfirms my reason for continuing to pursue this Psychology and Christian Counseling degree.

In addition to my own stress and anxiety of finally dealing with this Math course which has been taunting me for years, LOTS of other stuff decided to pop up in my life like they always do when I’m already feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Family, finances, employment, health, spiritual and other relationship issues took turns body slamming me down to the mat.

BUT, I have NEVER been one to stay down for the count! Ask anyone who knows me…

Years ago, I determined in my heart and mind that the best option during difficult times is to Intentionally Make Myself “Remain Calm in the Midst of The Storm” because life experiences have proven time and time again that ALL THINGS are but for a season and that God IS Always Faithful, Always Good, Always Working Behind The Scene, and IS Always, Always, Always On Time!!


I also trained myself to stay balanced by focusing my energy on what’s happening on the inside of me, instead of what is going on all around me. I’m very limited on what I can control on the outside. Sometimes, what’s happening all around us, especially when it comes to dealing with other people, may have nothing at all to do with us. So Stay Focused, Stay Balanced, and Stay Grounded!!

I repeat…Stay Focused, Stay Balanced, Stay Grounded!!

I say all of that to say this, Life, People and Things will knock you down, maybe even knock you out cold, sometimes more than once.

BUT, Don’t Ever Give Up and Don’t Ever Stay Down!!

Determine in your own heart and mind that, YOU ARE WORTH FIGHTING FOR, even if you or others don’t believe that you are.

Determine in your own mind that, Life IS Worth Living, No Matter how hard it gets!!

And as selfish as it may sound, Take Time For Yourself!!! Self Care is So Very Important for self preservation. Do not neglect to take the time needed to take care of yourself, regardless of what anyone else may say or believe, It’s Not selfish!!

Lastly, reach out and seek the help of a genuine and trustworthy friend or professional when it just gets to be too much for you to handle on your own!!!